Double Entendre Tomfoolery
by ZeroIXResoleon
Summary: Konata and Kagami joke around and run into trouble with double meanings of what they say. One Shot Fanfiction.


Hello, everybody, Resoleon here and welcome to a Lucky Star Fanfiction.

You probably said "Oh God" when you saw the title and if you did, I guess I can say that you have good feeling what's coming up.

I won't say anything else but...enjoy.

* * *

**Konata X Kagami Short Story: Double Entendre** **Tomfoolery**

Kagami and Konata were hanging out in Konata's room. Konata is just lying down in bed, reading her manga as well as having a part of her manga collection next to her. Kagami, on the other hand, is pacing the floor back and forth while taking occasional looks at Konata. Eventually, Kagami stops in her place and nods her head disapprovingly toward Konata. Konata herself didn't seem to notice.

"Still reading that manga, eh, Konata?" Kagami asked.

Konata only nodded.

Kagami talked while pacing. "Konata, all that manga you have is a giant waste of time and money. All of that manga is for no life geeks! I'd wish you give them up!"

Konata slowly puts her manga down to sit up and face Kagami. "Are you willing to bet on that?"

Kagami stopped again and stared at the insidious look of Konata. "What is on your oh so anime-oriented mind?"

Konata takes a coin off the table. "Well, let's have a coin flip. Fatality round! Only once! Heads, I'll give half my manga collection to you. Tails...I'll think of something you have to do for me."

Kagami snatches the coin off of Konata. "Oh, we'll bet! Heads!"

Kagami flips the coin in the air. As it's coming down, Konata catches it and places it on the top of her hand. It was tails.

Kagami's eyes went wide. "No! No! I can't believe I lost!"

Konata giggled. "You know what else you won't believe? What you have to do for me..."

Kagami's head lowered. "What are your demands?"

"You and me, Kagamin, are going to stay up all night watching High School Of The Dead!"

Kagami gulped. "I can already tell that it's a horror anime...huh?"

The coin slips off of Konata's hand and falls to the floor. It flipped sides as opposed to where it was on Konata's hand. Kagami seems to notice this and before Konata could get the coin back, Kagami snatched it first. From there, she saw that the coin didn't have heads on either side. A vain popped in Kagami's head and stared at Konata who looked a bit frightened.

"A two sided coin, eh, Kagamin?" Konata sprinted out of her room after saying that.

Kagami gave chase. "Don't worry Konata, I'll make sure who's dead of OUR high school...IS YOU!"

* * *

Konata was on a ladder, trying to change a light bulb. Kagami was holding the ladder in place. Konata unscrewed the light bulb and handed it to Kagami.

"Okay, Kagamin. Take this and hand me the wheresit."

Kagami became confused. She places the light bulb down and looks for what Konata could possibly be talking about.

"Where is it, Konata?"

"Yep, you heard me right, Kagamin. The wheresit, please."

"Yeah...where is it?"

"Yes, Kagamin, you got the name right. Now please hand it to me."

"That's what I'm asking. Where is it?"

"Come on, Kagamin. Please. Wheresit, stat."

"Darn it Konata! Just answer my question! WHERE IS IT?"

"The weresit is right in front of you, right next to the thingamajig you just placed down, Kagamin."

"Oh, I'm sorry, how dumb of me."

Kagami takes out a new light bulb to hand to Konata. She hands it aggressively to Konata. Konata takes it and starts screwing the new light bulb into the slot.

"Kagamin, I thought you knew what a wheresit is. Depending on which one you need, it also needs a varying level of whats."

Kagamin rolled her eyes. "Yeah, I can see that light bulbs have watts."

"Whats."

"What?"

"You got it, whats."

"What?"

"That's right, whats!"

"Say what?"

Konata finished screwing the lightbulb. "Exactly! You're catching on pretty quick for a change, Kagamin!"

Kagami growled. Out of the corner of her eye, she spots a plunger. She picks it up and points it to Konata. "Konata, if you don't start making sense here, I'm going to start smashing your thingamajigs with this thingamabob!"

Konata giggles from the ladder.

Kagami's eyes thinned. "What's so funny?"

"Kagamin, that's not a thingamabob. That's the plunger my dad used when he had to unclog the toilet about an hour ago when he had to take a crap."

Kagami's face turns green. "What the f***!"

Kagami drops the plunger and cringes on the floor. Konata laughs from the ladder.

* * *

Kagami is reading her light visual novel. Konata taps her shoulder to get her attention.

"Yes, Konata?"

Konata scratched her head. "I was wondering...what was your weirdest fan experience?"

Kagami's face blushed. "Um...wow...thanks for thinking that about me, Konata but...I don't have any fans."

"Sure you do. I saw you with your fan a couple of days ago."

Kagami smiled at Konata. "Aw...stop it. You're going to make me blush."

Konata had a confused look. "I don't see why you have to be so embarrassed about having a fan, Kagami. Everyone has a fan."

Kagami started to laugh. "Konata. What the heck are you talking about? Why would I be embarrassed if I had a fan if I were a celebrity?"

"Huh? I'm not talking about that kind of fan; I'm talking about the electric kinds that are supposed to cool you."

Kagami's eyes went wide. "Oh...well...why didn't you just say so?"

"I thought you knew, Kagamin." Konata giggled.

Kagami groaned.

* * *

Konata is watching Kagami play a game on Starcraft on the Nintendo 64. Kagami looks a bit frustrated because her army didn't seem to be winning the battle.

Kagami sighed in frustration. "I guess I have to pull out..."

Konata snickered. "That's what she said..."

A vain popped in Kagami's head.

* * *

Kagami was reaching up the cabinet for a bag of chips. Konata was looking after.

"What are you reaching for, Kagamin?"

Kagami spoke in breaks. "I'm...trying...to...get this...bag of chips..."

"Well it looks like you won't reach it anytime soon."

Kagami gave up on it. "How about lending a hand?"

Konata giggles.

"Don't even think about it, Konata!"

* * *

Konata had just won for the fifth time in a row against Kagami. Kagami spikes the controller on the bed out of frustration."My head is just not wired to play fighting games."

"Don't worry, Kagmain. Do you want me to be gentler or a little rougher?"

Kagami stared at Konata with a looked that asked "WTF". "What did you just ask me?"

"I asked if you wanted me to be less physical." Konata said oblivious to the double meaning of her previous statement.

Kagami chose her words carefully. "Just don't...be as less...professional as you are..."

* * *

Konata was moaning. "Kagamin! Take it out! I can't...go on like this!"

"Konata, just shut up and let me do my thing."

"I know this isn't the first time...but I don't think you need to be so rough."

"I told you to shut up and be still!"

"Kagamin...please...don't be so...ah! It hurts...so much!" Konata moaned again.

"I...will...destroy you if you keep that up..."

"Don't toy with me, Kagamin..." Konata moaned the loudest from the previous two times.

Kagami holds up a tiny wooden piece. "I swear that this is the last time I'll agree to help you when you have a splinter stuck in your finger..."

* * *

Konata is playing Starcraft once again and this time, she was winning the battle but this battle was a bit tedious.

"Wow...I have to go deeper than I thought..." Kagami said out loud.

Kagami heard Konata whispered something.

Kagami glared at Konata. "You just whispered 'That's what she said'."

Konata puts her arms out as if she was admitting something. "Duh, Kagamin."

* * *

Kagami entered Konata's house. "Yo, Konata!"

"Hey, Kagamin. I just returned from shopping."

"Oh, really? What did you get?"

"Oh, some shoes."

"Really? So you decided to finally get a new pair, eh?"

Konata blushed. "Um...yeah...Kagamin..."

* * *

Kagami and Konata were playing Super Glove Ball on the NES using Power Gloves.

"So, how do you play this game, Konata?"

"Well...there's not much of an objective in this game. You're just going around...grabbing balls."

An awkward silence occurs as they silently played the game which only lasted for a second.

Konata unwraps her glove. "Let's not play this game anymore."

Kagami followed suit. "Agreed..."

* * *

Konata was not agreeing with the decision making that Kagami was making in yet another game of Starcraft.

"Kagamin, I think your army is good enough."

"No, I need more Zealots." Kagami said focused on the screen.

"You have enough Dragoons. Just move out."

"My army is still half-cocked. I need more Zealots to soak up damage-DAMN IT!" Kagami realized the double meaning of her first statement.

* * *

"Kagamin! I got us a new type of candy!"

"Sweet. Let's give it a try."

Kagami and Konata took from the bag, an odd looking ball. Kagami went first to put it in her mouth and after struggling to chew it, she realized that she was doing it wrong.

"Oh, you have to suck on it..."

Kagami heard Konata whispered something. "Darn it, Konata! Did you throw another 'That's what she said' joke at me?"

"...No..."

_"That freaking girl really pisses me off, sometimes!"_

* * *

Don't ask where I heard all of these...

So anyway, I hope you enjoy it and I feel like I need to call an exorcist for myself.

**Double Entendre Tomfoolery: End**


End file.
